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I felt guilty even thinking about the possibility and could not fathom the idea of dating so soon after my husband had died. I was worried you would never want to date again after Mark.I buried this idea along with the letter knowing I would re-enter the dating scene in my own time. I was by myself at the grocery store and I looked up to find a man watching me with an interested look in his eye. I called him and asked him what he thought about me dating. I’m so happy you are considering it.” Her response wasn’t what I expected, but from both her and my father-in-law’s answers I felt better about moving forward.I decided to trust that my body was telling me ‘it’s OK! When I was so wrapped up in the sadness of losing Mark, I had no space to let someone in. He and I met a month later and spent seven hours together on our first date.For the first year after her husband Mort died of cancer, Mary Childs, now 68, looked mainly to her two sisters and her quilting friends for comfort and a social connection.”I couldn’t do much more than that," says the Lakewood, CO, retired nurse.It was the most difficult thing Jeff Crispell had ever been through—the loss of his wife of 25 years, Rosanne, to a rare form of cancer.Six years ago, doctors found a large tumor in her sinus cavity, and Mr. Crispell will never forget what they said after the biopsy: “Prepare for the worst.” He took the next two years to be her full-time caretaker. I was thirty-nine years old when my husband died unexpectedly in his sleep. He was my love, my rock, a crucial part of my life and our children’s future, and in an instant, he was gone.

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Make sure it's something you're really ready to try before taking that step. But five months was when I felt ready to at least test the dating waters.Grieving and the process of moving on is something that's unique to each person.Some people take years, others weeks, and then there are those who choose never to date again.Also, if the person was terminally ill and that illness took a long time to run it’s course, the widowed person may have done a lot of grieving prior to the actual occurrence of death and might be ready to date earlier than ‘the experts’ predict.For me, it was 18 months before I considered dating again.

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